Why?

Just by the way, here is an annoying thing that happens while you're hosting people in a foreign country. Although I would first like to go on record about how I have strived to keep this blog rant-free, or at the very least rant-minimum. I understand that many blogs revolve around the rant. But that, for the most part, is not my personality, and not something I enjoy reading, so I consciously avoid it unless I think it is particularly funny or relevant.

But what they'll do - people, that is - is ask you questions as though you have done a survey on the country regarding every concept under God.

Example One: Dad

"I have a question for you: I was at the Kylemore Abbey Cafeteria, and I ordered a turkey sandwich. And on this cold sandwich is shredded cheddar cheese. So, as I'm eating it, the cheese all falls out! What kind of a country makes a cold sandwich with shredded cheese? It makes no sense at all!"

I was really tempted to say: perhaps Kylemore Abbey Cafeteria just sucks? Honestly, I don't have the first clue. It's not as though (1) I've noticed this as an Irish sandwich trend, nor (2)if I did would I have given much thought to it.

Example Two: Cottonheads (apologies to Great Disapprover, but I can't abandon the name now).

We're walking along and one of the Cottonheads wants to know: "Patrick, why do they put down different textured stone at the corners as opposed to the regular sidewalks?"

Why is the sky blue? Why do we park in a driveway but drive on a parkway? I think, to a certain extent, people just get so used to me being able to explain why the Irish can't swim, or why it's rude to offer tips, that they just presume that I am a fountain of information for all things Irish, or even European. But some things just are (why do men like sports and women like shopping? why do I always have to sleep on the wet spot?) and neither I nor the Angry Grammarian can explain them.